Whats Funny Chords

Standard (EADGBE)

DMy show is a little bit silGly and a littleD bit pretentiGous

Like ShDakespeare's willy or NGoam ChomskyBm wearing a strap on, A

It's Dalso a little bit gay anGd a little offDensive, G

Like ThDanksgiving Day or NoaGm Chomsky Bmwearing a strap on, A

So put your cell phDones to vibrate, G

And put your vibratoBmrs to cell phone Amode,

DWelcome to the show it goes a littleG bit like this, Bm

JOKE... (laAugh)... exactly.

DWelcome to my flow it flows a littGle bit like this, Bm

With a rap Aa dist and a,

DSwift rap on the wrist aG wrap and a kiss,

BmLike Hershey's wrapping a kiss shit. A

DI got a show that'll test ya Gkids,

Then ask Bmone question and the question is, A

What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

Oh, HumDor is often linked to sGhared experienBmce, A

Like a guyD gets up and says,

"have you noticeGd that public restrooms have really inefficient hanBmd dryers, A

Oh my god, Dyes I have, HA GHA HA, Bm

Really good point, Athey should fix that, D

Its gGood to know that somebody finBmally gets me, A

because my wife divDorced me which Sub-Consciously forced me, G

to lBmose all sense of self. A

So its niDce to think about hand dryersG and not that cheating whoBmre, A

Because standD up comedy is actually pretty eGasy, Bm A

If you're an asianD comic just get up and saGy,

"My mothers got the weirdest fucBmking accent" A

then just do, aD chinese accent, becGause everybody laughs at the chinese acceBmnt, A

Because they privatelDy thought that your people were laughableG,

And now you've given themBm the chance to express that in publicA,

If you're a musiDcal comic, just give 'em a litGtle weird voice inflectBmion A

D G Bm [stop]

Then take a Viagra and slap 'em with a rock hard misdirection

What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

[stop]

TOURETTE'S!

What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy? And the audience says

When I was a baby, maDybe I laughed at peopGle jiggling keys, Bm A

Now I'm olderD and bolder,

And just get mad 'caGuse i notice that the keys are to a HummerBm, A

Fuck my life ID don't fuck my wife, G

so fuck my wife anBmd fuck my life, A

and my son is gay, butD not sitcom gay, G

My daughter's a whore likBme another girl who used to be her motherA,

But the marrDiage made her miss merry americana, G

BmI want a teen without screaminAg prima-donna,

But the radiDcal feminists made my wifGe a man, Bm A

And if I dieD happy the situation Gwill be autoerotic asphyxBmiation, A

DI hate my life Gand it hates me back, Bm A

and my friend is black, D

but I Gdon't know what to call him, so BmI just call himA...

D"Yo whatup JGamaal?", Bm

[stop] A

Even though his name is Steve,

I DHate my job I hate my life, hate my kidsG I hate my wife,

BmJews would know I do it; Judas beat Ame to it,

DI'm slowly slipping into a solipsisticG coma, Bm A

A [just strum angrily a bunch of times]

And I masturbate because I'm the only one who's standards are low enough to fuck me....

.....

What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

[stop]

*pop* It's a boy!

What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

Hopefully this D A D