Standard (EADGBE)

While digesting Readers Digest in the back of a dirty book store

A plastic flag with gum on the back Fell out on the floor.

Well I picked it up and ran outside And slapped it on my windowshield.

And If I could see old Betsy Ross Id tell her how good I feel.

(Chorus)

But, your flag decal won’t get you into Heaven anymore.

They’re already overcrowded From your dirty little war

Now Jesus don’t like Killin’ No matter what the reasons for.

And your flag decal won’t get you into Heaven anymore.

Well I went to the Bank this morning And the cashier said to me

If you join the Christmas Club We'll give you ten of them flags for free.

I didn’t mess a round a bit I took him up on what he said

And stuck them stickers all over my car And one on my wifes forehead.

(Chorus)

Well I got my windshield so filled with flags I couldn’t see

So I ran my car upside a curb and right into a tree

By the time they got a doctor down I was already dead,

And I’ll never understand Why the man,

Standing in the Pearly Gates said

(Chorus)