Standard (EADGBE)
(verse 1)
down on haley haley street
where the drugs are easy and the sex is cheap
___(N)____
you never know just who youll meet on haley
crack dealer looks at his door
winks his eye and waits for his whore ___(N)____
she dont want to turn tricks anymore on haley
(chorus)
you dont have to walk the straight and narrow
as long as you drive up in a camaro-o
(verse 2)
tattoo parlor why dont you hang out
let em show you what its all about
___(N)____
were gonna help you work it on out on haley
dont need no licence dont need no subpeona
you can hook up with your friend regina
___(N)____
makin fun if you know what i mean on haley
(chorus)
you dont have to walk the straight and narrow
as long as you drive up in a camaro-o
(bridge)
goin down down down down down d-down down down d-down on haley
goin down down down down down d-down down down d-down on haley
_____________________________(N)______________________________
goin down down down down down d-down down down d-down on haley
_____________________________(N)______________________________
goin down down down down down d-down down down d-down on haley
_____________________________(N)______________________________
goin down down down down down d-down down down d-down on haley
_____________________________(N)______________________________
(heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ya-e-ya ohh ohh haley)
goin down down down down down d-down down down d-down on haley
_____________________________(N)______________________________
(heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ya-e-ya ohh ohh haley)
goin down down down down down d-down down down d-down on haley
(2X) end on
2. GOLFSHIRT
(intro)
(play 2 E~s then play):
(verse 1)
im not the one you dream about
and im not the one who can live without (live without)
im not the one who you wanna see
im not the one who you want to be seen with
(chorus)
and when youre tired of all the jerks
and youre tired of all the work
^
and youre tired of being hurt
you will long for the comfort of my golfshirt
(verse 2)
im not the one who was an old time punk rocker
i was listenin to rush and tryin to feather my hair back
when all that stuff went down
im not the one who was in a high school hardcore band
i sat in my room scorin with ms pacman
(chorus)
and when youre tired of all the jerks
and youre tired of all the work
^
and youre tired of being hurt
you will long for the comfort of my golfshirt
(ending)
(bass plays a version of the solo for first 2 lines)
no tats no piercings no hats no grungebeard baby yeah
no tats no piercings and no hats no grungebeard baby
^~
yeaaaahh oh yeaaaahhh oh-oh-oh yeaaaahhh ya-
-ya-
-ya-
-ya-
^~
yeaaaahh oh yeaaaahhh oh-oh-oh yeaaaahhh ya-
-ya-
-ya-
-ya-
^
yeah no tats (no tats) no piercings no hats (no hats) no grungebeard baby
^
yeah no tats (no tats) no piercings no hats (no hats) no grungebeard baby
^
yeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh yeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh ya-
-ya-
-ya-
-ya-
^
yeaaaahh oh yeaaaahhh oh-oh-oh yeaaaahhh ya-
-ya-
-ya-
-ya-
-yeah
(for ending just slide up and down fretboard and land on E!)
3. SORRY
(verse 1)
sorry we broke up sorry i missed you
sorry i wanted only to kiss you
sorry i promised to love you forever
made you feel guilty oh when you left me
(M)
sorry i showed up at your party
sorry i drank up all the bicardi
sorry i puked up on your bedspread
(N)
sorry i wanted to be your boyfriend again
(chorus)
what can i do its over its over its over its over
what can i do i am a loser
(verse 2)
(M)
sorry i saw you and i heard birds sing
sorry i touched you and i heard bells ring
sorry i jacked off outside of your window
while you were sleeping i thought youd never know
sorry i showed up at your wedding
sorry i tried so hard to get in
sorry i screwed up your pictures
sorry i had sex with your sister
(chorus)
what can i do its over its over its over its over
what can i do i am a loser
made you feel guilty oh when you left me
sorry i showed up at your dinner
sorry i said those things to your father
sorry i crashed through your window on acid
sorry i made a mess sorry i bled to death
(chorus)
what can i do its over its over its over its over
what can i do i am a loser i am a loser oh oh
what can i do its over its over its over its over
what can i do i am a loser
4. EASY MARK
(after first time)
waaaaaaaahhhh
(verse 1)
(M)
ya she shes bustin out
put the suitcase in the pinnow
(N)
and get the hell out of ohio
(chorus)
she gets on that great highway
doesnt want to be anywhere
shes an easy mark oh oh oh oh oh oh
shes an easy maaaaaaaaaaark oh oh
(verse 2)
(M)
ya he hes got a master plan
ya hes gonna make a fortune
(N)
panning gold out of a bottle of gold slegger
shot by shot by shot
(chorus)
he gets on that great highway
doesnt want to be anywhere
hes an easy mark oh oh oh oh oh oh
hes an easy maaaaaaaaaaark
(bridge)
she lays down in the grass
on strawberry hill
he is there
smelling like nicotine and peanut butter
you gotta love her
she doesnt wanna change this time
theres a hunger in her soul
for tater tot casserole
with the crispy on the outside oh oh oh
(chorus)
she gets on that great highway
doesnt want to be anywhere
shes an easy mark oh oh oh oh oh oh
shes an easy maaaaaaaaaaark oh oh
(ending)
i hate this world this stupid world this screwed up world
i hate this world this fucking world
5. VAN HALEN
(intro)
E---3~---3-5-3---3-3/5-5-5\3-|
(verse 1)
i bought van halen one it was the best damn record
i ever owned T G and Y 1978
two-hand tapping guitar technique
really got me off erection yeah
aint talkin bout love im on fire
(chorus)
tomorrow may come tomorrow may never come again
cant you hear jamie cryin shes runnin with the devil
oh loooooord oh looord
E---3~---3-5-3---3-3/5-5-5\3-|
(verse 2)
i bought women and children first fair warning
and van halen two dance the night away
1984 my favorite record yeah i wore it down
might as well jump might as well jump
(chorus)
cant you hear jamie cryin shes runnin with the devil
oh loooooord oh looord
(verse 3)
is this what you wanted? sammy hagar
sammy hagar is this what you wanted man
dave lost his hairline but you lost your cool buddy
never again never again never again never again never again
no no no
(chorus)
cant you hear jamie cryin shes runnin with the devil
oh loooooord oh looord
Solo
(ending)
jump jump jump jump jump jump jump might as well
jump jump jump jump jump jump jump might as well
ju-ump
6. DIANA
(intro)
oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhh
(verse 1)
i saw her at the club she was standin with a frech girl
bonsoir julie pup? yes she had a beautiful smile
and they met at face to face went back to his place
she sat on his face and now its history
the rest is history she sat on his face and the rest is history
(chorus)
^
thats why he cried he lost he lost everything
^
thats why he cried he lost it all he lost it all to
^
diana diana part german part hispanic
^
diana phillipino diana where did you go
(verse 2)
i saw her downtown she was standin with the cool girls
she was hangin out with steve and that was where she wanted to be
she was workin at the place where they sell veal parmijan
now shes gone now shes gone yeah shes gone oh so gone
(chorus)
^
thats why he cried he lost he lost everything
^
thats why he cried he lost it all he lost it all to
^
oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhh
(M)
oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhh
(N)
oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-ohhh oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhh
7. NOSERING GIRL
(played simultaneously through song except chorus)
(after 2X)
oh
(after 4X)
A---5\3~--3/5--5/7--7\5\3----------------------------|
(verse 1)
i i met a girl she was standing on the dance floor
of the club she was a very very pretty girl
so i went up and talked to her and when you share
your thoughts with soooomeone you feel close to theeem
(chorus)
nosering girl i love you
nosering girl i want you i want you i want you
nosering girl i love you
nosering girl i want you i want you i want you
(verse 2)
yeah she had pretty hair and beutiful eyes and a
dalmation jacket (dalmation jacket)
and she was the kind of girl who you would give up
eating meat for no more salami no more steak or potatoes
yeah you would walk on down to the health food store
and buy humace and taboolie and babaganousch
and rice cakes rice cakes rice cakes
(chorus)
nosering girl i love you
nosering girl i want you i want you i want you
nosering girl i love you
nosering girl i want you i want you i want you
(verse 3)
as it turns out she was the cousin
of the ex-girlfriend of my good friend steve
my very good friend steve but she didnt like me
she said i was a drunkard an alchoholic
weirdo
freak!
freak?
nosering
(chorus)
nosering girl i love you
nosering girl i want you i want you i want you
nosering girl i love you
nosering girl i want you i want you i want you
i want you i want you i want you i want you
i want you i want you i want you i want you
i want you i want you i want you i want you
i want you i want you i want you i want you
i want you
yeah
were warmin up were warmin up
8. ANNALEE
(verse 1)
(M)
wearin flash pants and her streetwalker shooooes
walkin downtown with a pocket full of booze
(N)
shes the one who wants so much
shes the one you can you can never touch
(chorus)
here comes annalee
annalee yeaaahh here comes annalee
(verse 2)
(M)
standin on the corner you see her cuttin a deal
windows rolled down you cant believe shes for real
(N)
shes the one it aint no joke
shes got lips lips just like cherry coke
(chorus)
here comes annalee
annalee yeaaahh here comes annalee
annalee yeaaahh here comes annalee
annalee yeaaahh annalee yeaaahh
annalee yeaaahh
9. YOU'RE GONNA BE THE ONE WHOSE SORRY
(intro)
ive got my mind set
(verse 1)
gotta a new job at a radio station but that wont help you at all
40,000 watts of maximum rock but that wont help you at all
you think youve got everything but ive got news for you
(chorus)
youre gonna be the one whose sorry
youre gonna be the one whose sorry
youre gonna beeeeeee the one whose soooooorry
(verse 2)
you got a new girlfriend a bitchin new girlfriend
but she wont help you at all
Said i'd fight with the scene shes a local rock queen
but that wont help you at all
you think that youve got it made but youve made one mistake
(chorus)
youre gonna be the one whose sorry
youre gonna be the one whose sorry
youre gonna beeeeeee the one whose soooooorry
(bridge)
^~
yeah
(verse 3)
the theater group calls you a local celebrity
but that wont help you at all
youre such a big big deal you get in the club for free
but that wont help you at all
(M) (N)
you think youve got everything but ive got news for you
(chorus)
youre gonna be the one whose sorry
youre gonna be the one whose sorry yeah
youre gonna be the one whose sorry
youre gonna be the one whose sorry
youre gonna beeeeeee the one whose soooooorry
10. I ONLY EAT CANDY
(intro)
^
^
^
^
ahhh
(verse 1)
i i dont kill and i dont murder or manufacture atomic weapons
^
^
and i dont eat meat and i dont eat vegetables no no no
(chorus)
^
^
cause i only eat candy oh oh oh i only eat sweets
^
^
yeah i only eat candy my friend oh oh oh i i only eat candy
(play this 4X)
(verse 2)
and i i dont believe no i dont believe in your corny old jesus
^
^
and i dont worship satan no not like charlie and steve no no no
(chorus)
^
^
cause i only eat candy oh oh oh i only eat sweets
^
^
yeah i only eat candy my friend yeah i i only eat candy yeah
(play this 4X)
im angry
(bridge)
^
^
ylno tae ydnac ylno tae steews ylno tae ydnac ylno tae ydnac
^
(chorus)
^
^
cause i only eat candy oh oh oh i only eat sweets
^
^
yeah i only eat candy my godd friend oh i i only eat candy yeah
(play this 4X)