5 Poofs And 2 Pianos Chords

Standard (EADGBE)

OAbviously I don't want to infer that being inE/G♯vited onto Friday Night with Wossy

isn't wonderfully affirming,F♯m and I know I Eoughta

Aappreciate the risk you took, the bookers who agreed to book

E/G♯ F♯m

aE chap who tends to talk about the kinda things that get the BBC in hot water.

And I A6don't want to seem greedy, I'm just saying

IE'd like to be here every week if that's OK.

Fo7(or E7b9/F)

And, if you'll hear me out, I think I've got a way

in which F♯mwe could do it Epretty easiDly.

You can leave all the boring details to Eme.

It's a A6brilliant idea, a Eadd2truly Aoriginal F♯mconcAept.

A6No one in Britain has Eadd2ever dAone anything like it E/Byet.

Picture this - imagine if we had

fAive poofs and E/G♯two pianos F♯m- yeah, it's a Ewicked iDdea.

Why Asettle for a quartet of E/G♯queers

When there's a D/F♯possibility of a Epenta-poofter-piano-posse here?

FAive poofs and E/G♯two pianos F♯m- yeah, Eit'll be Dace:

a Ahundred percent more piaE/G♯nos and twenty five perDcent more Agays.

Pickup: E F♯ G♯

IA know, I know, I've seen the problem too.

TE/Ahere's a rumour I am straight, it's true.

ID/At hurts to admit it, but I'm about as Dmbent

as Wossy himself or DmFiddy Cent.

BAut I've already thought it through.

DE/A'you know there's preachers in America who reckon they can do

sexuDality conversions. I've heard them assert

they can D7cure a man of trouser love and turn him onto skirt.

Well I E7don't see why they couldn't pull the same trick in reverse, and we'd have -

fAive poofs and E/G♯two pianos F♯m- yeah, it's a ErevoDlution

and Aprobably the best soE/G♯lution

to the problem you're Dinevitably having with an Eeven number of homosexuals.

Pickup: E F♯ G♯

YAes I know your producers might suspect

tE/Ahat the licence-paying public will object

tD/Ao the Corporation having Dyet

another homoDmsexual to pay.

TAhe Daily Mail will bring the big guns out.

JE/Aan Moir will be frothing at the mouth,

wD/Ariting further brilliant stuff about

tDmhe myth about being both happy and gEay.

But F♯mall that moral F♯mindiAgnF♯matioC♯n

will D/F♯disappear when they seeA/E

those Dfour lovely guys and Ame

Bmsinging in perfect harEmony.

And F♯mall Athose angry letter writers,

likeD/A 'Disgusted' from the Isle of Wight

and F♯m'MadA' from Hull and 'Outraged' from Leeds

and 'ESlightly Annoyed' from E7Berwick on Fo7Tweed,

will F♯minstantly Echange their Dtune.

They'll be Ableeding-heart liberals by ESaturday noon.

They'll be Dgiving their grandchildren up for adoption

in the Ehope that a gay married E7couple will aFo7dopt 'em.

They'll be Fputting rainbow stickers on their cars,

G E (Bass line - A

E F E G A)

and cutting holes in the arse of their leather strides.

And watching 2 pianos and 5 guys

Watching 2 pianos and 5 guys

G (picks up on the G in the bass line)

Watching 2 pianos and five ..1, 2 ,3, 4,

5C poofs and G/B2 pianos Am- yeah, Git'll be Fgrand.

You can Cnever have too many G/Bpianos or Ftoo much Cman.

5C poofs and G/B2 pianos - Ammaybe we could out Jamie FCullum.

GMake it a trio of pianos and a Fbig gay half Cdozen.