Standard (EADGBE)

Verse 1

An angel rode the bus home

I believed her wings were broken

She asked me the time of day

I asked if she was joking

She smiled like a woman

And her tricks were turning

I smiled like a baby

And felt my body burning

Chorus

La di di da

Yodelayheehoo

There's people in me head sayin'

Yodelaaaaaayheehoo

Verse 2

She asked how I was doing

Not expecting me to answer

I said fairly well

Doctors say I killed the cancer

It’s going out of style

She inquired about the flavor

I said it wasn’t mine

It was in my next door neighbor

Verse 3

I scratched my big red nose

As the wind blew through my beard

If I shave too often

My face looks really weird

She pulled out her bandana

It wasn’t dirty or red

Even though inside held

A severed shrunken head

Verse 4

I stared like a creep

Into those tiny eyes

And then one winked at me

As the other began to cry

She started laughing

And tickling its chin

Like it was a baby

Or newborn kitten

Verse 5

I pulled out my cell phone

It melted in my hand

She pulled out a bottle

And fed the little man

I dinged the dinger

The bus came to a stop

She said thank you sir

This is where I get off

Verse 6

I swallowed my vomit

So casual and discreet

But the taste of eggs and mushrooms

Sent it splattered on my feet

I ran for the exit

The driver hit the breaks

I screamed like a woman

I didn’t say thanks

Verse 7

I wanted to sneeze

Then I wanted to shave

I wanted to steal her head

And put him in a grave

I’m glad her wings are broken

I hope they turn to dust

I'm gonna learn to drive a car

And never take the bus